The average American checks their phone 205 times each day and spends about one-quarter of their waking hours on that addictive device each day. Time surrendered to screens has increased at least 30% in just the last five years; the unchecked proliferation of digital media and its influence over our lives is arguably the defining feature of the 21^st century.

There’s no point spitefully opposing screens, digital media, and artificial intelligence. These tools keep us connected, learning, and informed, but the price we pay is the persistent erosion of our attention. Technology companies invest billions in developing powerful algorithms made to embezzle our attention, with little regard for the near- and long-term effects on health and wellbeing. The risks are particularly high for young people with ADHD who experience impulsivity, altered reward processing, time management challenges, and difficulty with boredom.

Multiple states are now issuing orders to curb phone use in schools and U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy has called for warning labels on social media platforms, suggesting that digital media checks and balances are taking shape. To that end, here are steps you can take to regain control over your digital media use.

How Do Screens Affect Us?

Perpetual Distraction

Technology exploits the information-foraging nature of the brain. We evolved to seek and value information because it’s useful for survival. We don’t always know how to filter out too much information. That’s why it’s so tough to ignore the constant pings, dings, and other incessant notifications that force their way into our brains.

The Fiction of Multitasking

Our brains can only focus on one task at a time, yet many of us, seduced by our devices, assume that we can easily switch between tasks. Task switching is costly not just to productivity, but to brain functioning. It deteriorates attention span, which, according to some reports, has decreased from two and a half minutes in 2004 to about 47 seconds today.

[Think You May Be Addicted to Your Phone? Take This Screener] 

Aversion to Delays

The sheer speed of apps, sites, and game today has made us averse to delays. Ever notice yourself growing impatient if a page takes 10 seconds to load? We want stimulation constantly and immediately. An aversion to postponing gratification is problematic — patience and the ability to handle discomfort are essential for healthy functioning.

FOMO and Anxiety

Excessive pressure to stay connected to technology for fear of missing out (FOMO) drives anxiety, keeping us compulsively stuck to our devices and driving a feedback loop.

Restore Control: How to Unplug

Check In with Yourself

Ask yourself the following questions (and be honest in your answers) to gauge where you stand with your digital media habits:

• “Is my smartphone use a problem for me? If so, in what ways?”
• “Am I spending more time on my smartphone, computer, or device than I want?”
• “Am I too distracted by notifications on my smartphone, computer, or other device?”
• “Am I compulsively looking at my smartphone when I don’t really need to be?”
• “Do I worry too much about what I’m missing if I’m not checking my smartphone?”
• “Is it hard for me to resist looking at my smartphone when I’m doing other things, such as working, studying, spending time with people, walking, or driving?”
• “Am I unhappy with my social media presence?”
• “Am I an active or a passive user on social media?”
• “Am I using social media as a substitute for real life?”
• “Does social media leave me feeling inadequate or disappointed about my life?”

[Read: Can’t Stop Clicking? Here’s How to Beat “Infomania”]

Commit to Conscious Change

Reducing time spent online is critical — and difficult. It takes effort and real commitment to break free from what is an automatic behavior for many of us. Here are a few actionable steps to curb your screen and online time:

• Use and app to track your daily social media activity for an accurate sense of how much attention you’re surrendering.
• Turn off your phone at key times like while you’re driving, in meetings, and with family and friends.
• Don’t bring your device to bed. Park your devices in a dresser or keep them outside of your room during bedtime.
• Disable app notifications to avoid distractions and feelings of FOMO.
• Interrupt compulsive checking. Decide specific times for checking your phone, for example. Keep your phone out of reach. Have a good reason for checking so that it’s not mindless.
• Avoid passive scrolling, which is more likely to lead to negative feelings and disconnectedness.
• Fill the void. Do you check social media because you’re bored? Stressed? Anxious? Lonely? Dissatisfied with your life? Question your reasons for escaping into the online world and see how you can tune in more to the real world. Keep a gratitude journal and track the positives. Spend time doing things in the physical world that make you feel good so that you’re better able to stay rooted in the present and restore your attention span.
• Do what you can, but do something. What will it take for you to improve your digital media habits, even by a few minutes a day? If you can’t turn off your phone during dinner, can you commit to not looking at it for the first 5 minutes of your meal? If you can’t disable notifications, can you be more selective about which ones come through? Remind yourself why you want to be in better control of your usage and what’s at stake.

Screen Addiction and ADHD: Next Steps

• Read: Wasting Time on Social Media? 6 Ways to Stop ADHD Brains from Doom Scrolling
• Read: Phone Distractions Were Sabotaging My Relationships, Sleep & Self-Esteem
• Read: ADHD Brains on Screens  — Decoding a Complicated Relationship
• Watch: Time to Unplug? How Screen Time Impacts the ADHD Brain

The content for this article was derived from the ADDitude ADHD Experts webinar titled, “The Journey to Independence: A Parent’s Guide to Delayed Adulthood with ADHD” [Video Replay & Podcast #503] with Anthony Rostain, M.D., M.A., which was broadcast on May 1, 2024.

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RSD makes everyday, non-threatening social encounters incredibly stressful. Because of RSD, I’ve missed one too many social activities to avoid dealing with the emotional fallout of potential rejection. Horrified that I would say or do something wrong, I would decline invitations from friends or skip optional work activities. My friendships and intimate relationships suffered as a result.

A change of plans, even if rational, would send me into a panic. My mind raced with catastrophic worst-case scenarios – beyond “this person doesn’t like me.” I scanned facial expressions for the slightest hint of negativity to confirm my irrational thoughts. At work, I second-guessed every decision and comment from coworkers, constantly fearing I’d be fired. As someone highly sensitive to feedback due to ADHD, perceived rejection or even constructive criticism felt unbearable and left deep emotional wounds.

Overcoming Rejection Sensitivity with Mindfulness

It took realizing that I was experiencing RSD in the first place for things to improvement to begin. Awareness of the biological roots of my intense reactions helped reduce my shame over what felt like a personal failing. But knowledge alone doesn’t always curb anxious thoughts in the moment. That’s where mindfulness steps in.

Mindfulness teaches you to observe your thoughts and feelings in the present moment without judgment. The idea is this: Pausing to observe calms intense emotions and provides space to avoid getting carried away by them. Below, I share a few mindfulness practices that have helped me cope with RSD.

[Get This Free Download: Understanding Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria]

1. Get Moving

At first, I struggled to literally sit still with racing RSD-fueled thoughts for more than a few minutes. I learned that it’s easier to enter a state of mindfulness while I walk. As I walk, I notice physical sensations to anchor my attention to, like my every inhale and exhale and the contact my feet make against the ground. Tracking small details is such an effective distraction from worrying narratives. Over time, I was able to sustain non-reactive awareness for longer periods.

2. Thoughtfully Question

Mindfulness also helps me recognize the cognitive distortions behind RSD. I learned to question whether my perceptions line up with facts. Was someone really angry at me just because their voice sounded off? Why assume the worst with little evidence? Approaching each situation with the willingness to question my reactions, again and again, eventually grew easier.

3. Write It Out

What is writing, if not a pure exercise in mindfulness? The process of channeling thoughts onto paper forces me to slow down, name what I’m feeling, and eventually look for a balanced perspective rather than stew in emotion.

4. Kind Self-Talk

Whether you’re walking or writing, kind self-talk is part of mindfulness. The trick is breaking patterns of harsh criticism after setbacks and replacing those with a thought or two about what went well. Learning to notice and appreciating small social wins boosted my confidence and made future interactions easier.

[Read: The Power of Positive Self-Talk — Increase Productivity and Happiness]

Today, RSD still comes, but I’m armed with coping skills. When anxiety rises, I breathe deeply and shift focus outward rather than spiraling inward. I try my best to pause before I react and stretch the space between desire and action. I accept uncertainty instead of constantly seeking reassurance that only prolongs distress. I don’t always get it right, and RSD sometimes gets the best of me, but regularly practicing mindfulness has undoubtedly upped my emotional resilience. Most importantly, I’m learning to be gentle with myself.

Overcoming Rejection Sensitivity with ADHD: Next Steps

• Get This Free Download: Emotional Regulation & Anger Management Scripts
• Read: “I Can’t Handle Rejection. Will I Ever Change?”
• Read: How Fear of Failure & Rejection Keep Us from Trying New Things

SUPPORT ADDITUDE
Thank you for reading ADDitude. To support our mission of providing ADHD education and support, please consider subscribing. Your readership and support help make our content and outreach possible. Thank you.

“I know how to eat healthy; it’s just so much work to plan, shop, cook, and clean up. Opening a bag of chips is so much easier.”

About half of adults with ADHD say that finding time to prepare healthy meals is a major barrier to better diet and nutrition, according to a new survey of 1,900 ADDitude readers. Additional challenges related to diet and nutrition cited by readers include the following:

• Resisting impulsive snacking: 48%
• Planning healthy meals: 43%
• Habitually overeating: 22%
• Dietary constraints, food allergies, or picky eating: 21%
• Grocery shopping: 20%
• Affording healthy foods: 13%
• Managing a health condition that impacts diet: 12%
• Low appetite or undereating: 12%

On a 10-point scale, where 10 is extremely satisfied, ADDitude readers rated their diet and nutrition a 4.97.

“I have a hard time not eating after dinner. When I’m watching TV, reading, or even just folding laundry at night, I get bored and food is a fun way to enjoy myself.”

“I eat as a coping skill. I have worked on it for years, but when things get bad, I eat.”

[Get This Free Download: ADHD Brain Food – What to Eat, What to Avoid]

Best Nutrition Apps, Meal Kits, and Health Resources for ADHD

Following are the top apps, meal kit services, websites, and other resources recommended by ADDitude readers for improving diet and nutrition.

• MyFitnessPal: An app to track food intake, calories, exercise, and overall health goals.
• Noom: A psychology-based weight loss app that combines tracking with behavioral coaching.
• Lose It! A calorie counting, nutrition tracking, and intermittent fasting app.
• Mealime: A meal-planning app that provides customizable recipes with integrated grocery shopping.
• WeightWatchers: A popular points-based weight-management program/app that also offers coaching and community.
• HelloFresh: A meal kit delivery service with pre-portioned ingredients and recipe cards.
• Blue Apron: Another popular meal kit subscription service.

“Mealime has been a lifesaver. It has tons of available, easy, tasty recipes with tons of customizable options. It makes grocery lists for you and even randomizes recipes to reduce over-buying and food waste. I have no idea how I’d feed myself without it.”

“Lose It! is mainly used for weight loss, but I use it to be more conscious of my food choices.”

Other Nutrition Resources

• Forks Over Knives: A website that promotes a whole-food, plant-based diet through recipes, meal plans, and educational content.
• Pick Up Limes: Offers plant-based recipes, videos, and lifestyle tips for mindful living and wellness.
• Brain Over Binge: A recovery resource and podcast that addresses binge eating through a neuroscience-based approach.
• NutritionFacts.org: A science-based website that provides unbiased nutrition information and research findings.
• Nerd Fitness: A fitness resource tailored to “geeks” that offers creative workout plans and habit-building tips.
• SuperCook: A recipe search engine that generates meals based on ingredients you already have
• GoblinTools. Its “Chef” feature can generate recipes that factor dietary constraints, serving sizes, equipment, time, and other personalized factors.

[Read: Build a Better Relationship with Food to Benefit Your Brain]

How to Eat Healthy: Essential Supports for ADHD Brains

What helps adults with ADHD eat healthy, resist impulsive snacking, and plan meals? Here’s how ADDitude readers rated the helpfulness of the following diet and nutrition supports on a 5-point scale, where 5 is extremely helpful:

• Medication (e.g., GLP-1 agonists): 3.54
• Spouse, family member, friend: 3.26
• Meal service (e.g., HelloFresh, Blue Apron): 3.10
• Registered dietician or nutritionist: 3.09
• Personal chef: 2.94
• Weight-loss or healthy-eating app or service: 2.86
• ADHD coach: 2.76
• Cooking class: 2.68

“Since starting semaglutide therapy, I have been able to stop dopamining through snacks. I can choose more nutritious foods and control portions.”

“ADHD medication curbed habitual overeating and impulsive snacking, which were both emotional coping mechanisms for me.”

“My husband’s nutrition and cooking habits not only help keep the family going, but also inspire me to do the same.”

How to Eat Healthy: ADHD-Friendly Strategies to Meal Plan and Resist Impulsive Snacking

1. Build in Accountability and Support

“Set monthly nutrition challenges and find people to keep you accountable.”

“Get a friend/family member/co-worker to check whether you’ve remembered to eat. My boss does this for me and it helps a lot.”

“Find a time to plan meals with a body double, maybe while on video.”

“My partner and I make weekly plans of what we will eat and who will be responsible for the cooking.

2. Curb Impulsive Eating with Strategic Buffers

“Cut veggies to have them available for snacking (with a yogurt dressing). Better than chips!”

“Consider getting groceries delivered, so you don’t see snack foods in stores.”

“I look at how much money I’ve saved from not impulsively buying something to eat. It’s a great way to see not just the cost in terms of weight, but the monetary cost, too.”

“I remind myself to check that I’m eating slowly and stop when I’m 8/10 full.”

“I’ve found quick healthy things that don’t require a lot of preparation, like instant oatmeal. They help with portion control and minimize the chances that I’ll order fast food.”

“I think of future-me. When I want to grab something easy, like chips, I say to myself ‘Midday-me will appreciate protein and fruit.’”

“I ask myself, ‘Do I need to eat this, or is this my brain seeking dopamine?’”

3. Reduce Decision Fatigue and Meal Planning Overwhelm

“Print out and laminate easy go-to recipes and stick them inside your kitchen cabinets. They’ll help you the next time you need inspiration.”

“I have days where all I want to do is be creative in the kitchen, and days where I have zero spoons for anything culinary. Making big batches of taco mince, bolognese sauce/ragu, stews and soups and freezing them in portions helps me stay nourished and feed my family when I’m in shutdown.”

“I have emergency meals stocked — like protein bars or Soylent — when I’m too tired or busy to make something.”

“Cook more than you require for healthy leftovers.”

“I maintain a list of meal options in a spreadsheet for inspiration when I’m having difficulty figuring out what to make. I also have a shared grocery list with my spouse, so that we can both add to it.”

“I have just started buying a few frozen meals to take the pressure of having to cook every night. My energy is usually pretty low in the evenings.”

“The ADHD tax of wasted food is immense. Give yourself permission to buy the prepared fruit salad or the diced/frozen/steam packed veggies. These things make better choices accessible.”

4. Do Things Your Way

“I allow myself to eat food the way I want to. Cutting up my sandwich into small cute triangles gives me extra dopamine and also makes the meal feel less intimidating.”

“I really appreciate the advice given online by ADHDers, (e.g., How to ADHD on YouTube) regarding how to eat well depending on your symptoms/needs. YouTube is a wealth of resources for learning how to cook or prepare food that you prefer to eat.”

“Have go-to weekday dishes that most will eat and do what you can. Not every meal needs to be fancy and Insta-worthy.”

5. Look Beyond Eating

“Getting more sleep often helps with my hunger.”

“I find that having an exercise class or other activity with others influences my diet and helps keep me on track.”

“Drink lots of water! Sometimes what we perceive as hunger is actually thirst. I also think having a glass of water gives me something to do and prevents me from snacking.”

“Track how you feel when you eat well.”

“Don’t do fad diets. Look at eating properly as a lifestyle and stick with it.”

How to Eat Healthy with ADHD: Next Steps

• Celebrate Every Step! Join the Small Wins Appreciation Network
• Download: Small Wins That Add Up to Big Change!
• Read: 9 Healthy Food Rules for ADHD Families — What to Eat, What to Avoid
• Read: Healthy Eating Habits for Impulsive, Dopamine-Starved ADHD Brains

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Register to reserve your spot for this free webinar and webinar replay ►

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Sleep problems are among the most frequent co-occurring disorders in people with ADHD. Research has shown that many people with ADHD even suffer from more than one sleep disorder, often of different etiology. Science has not yet solved the questions arising from these findings, but we do know that sleep loss impairs concentration, memory, mood stability, and the immune system’s functioning, increasing risk for infections and allergies. Not surprisingly, ADHD is associated with many allergies and infections. The importance of good sleep and its association with overall health cannot be overstated.

The good news is that most sleep disorders can be treated effectively, and doing so can reduce ADHD symptoms and lead to improved health and wellness.

In this webinar, you will learn:

• Why people with ADHD commonly suffer with sleep problems and disorders
• About the different kinds of sleep disorders, including the circadian sleep-wake disorder, delayed sleep phase type, insomnia, restless legs, periodic limb movement disorder and sleep apnea
• How researchers are working to better understand the close relationship between ADHD and sleep disorders
• About treatment study findings that show low-dose melatonin, bright light therapy and other interventions may help reduce ADHD symptoms and lead to better overall health.

Have a question for our expert? There will be an opportunity to post questions for the presenter during the live webinar.

Meet the Expert Speaker

J.J. Sandra Kooij is a psychiatrist at PsyQ, psycho-medical programs, and Head of the Expertise Center Adult ADHD, in the Netherlands. She is a professor of adult ADHD studies at the Department of Psychiatry, VU University Medical Center, Amsterdam. She has published more than 100 peer-reviewed international papers and more than 20 books or book chapters on ADHD in adults.

Since 2002, Dr. Kooij has been the head of the Dutch Expertise Center Adult ADHD, leading research, treating patients, educating professionals, informing the public, and publishing books, scientific papers, websites, webinars and podcasts. She recently launched a new ADHD app, Super Brains. Read more about Dr. Kooij here.

Join an ADHD and Women’s Health Survey!  PsyQ Expertise Center Adult ADHD, in collaboration with ADHD Europe, developed an international survey on the experiences and health of women with ADHD. Are you a woman and do you have ADHD symptoms? You are invited to participate in this survey!

ADHD and Sleep: More Resources

• Download: Sleep Disorders Linked to ADHD
• Self-Test: Could You Have Delayed Sleep Phase Disorder?
• Read: What Comes First: ADHD or Sleep Problems?
• Read: How to Fall Asleep with a Rowdy, Racing ADHD Brain
• Free eBook: How to Sleep Better with ADHD

Webinar Sponsor

The sponsor of this ADDitude webinar is…

ADHD and disordered sleep can disrupt daily life, but you can take back control. Play Attention, inspired by NASA technology and backed by Tufts University research, helps you strengthen executive function and gain cognitive control. By combining mindfulness training with cognitive exercises, our program empowers you to manage focus, emotions, and routines—building the foundation for better sleep and overall well-being.

Start our online ADHD assessment now or schedule your 1:1 consultation. www.playattention.com 828-243-9291

ADDitude thanks our sponsors for supporting our webinars. Sponsorship has no influence on speaker selection or webinar content.

Certificate of Attendance: For information on how to purchase the certificate of attendance option (cost $10), register for the webinar, then look for instructions in the email you’ll receive one hour after it ends. The certificate of attendance link will also be available here, on the webinar replay page, several hours after the live webinar. ADDitude does not offer CEU credits.

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Exercise is hugely beneficial to ADHD brains. It can also be pretty boring. And tiring. And inconvenient. And expensive.

All of which makes exercise a game-changing and seldom-used tool for ADHD management. In a recent ADDitude survey, 55% of respondents said they were dissatisfied with their exercise regimen and physical health. The most common obstacles cited by the 1,885 respondents include:

• Sticking to an exercise routine: 59%
• Just getting started: 43%
• Overcoming boredom with exercise: 21%
• Managing a disability that impacts physical activity: 17%
• Pushing myself to try something new: 9%
• Finding an affordable, accessible workout options: 7%

“The motivation to continue with exercise is a major challenge. Boredom is a total killer of any good intentions in this, as in other, life realms.” — Liv, Texas

“I struggle with fatigue and lack of motivation due to over-exertion of executive function demands.” — Tracey, California

[Read: The ADHD Exercise Solution]

Exercise Apps for ADHD Brains

Convenient, low-cost, and rated 2.82 (out of 5) on our helpfulness scale, exercise apps can kickstart and fuel an exercise routine. Whether you prefer yoga, running, or pumping iron, there’s an app that can support your workout goals. Here are our readers’ 10 top recommendations:

• Couch to 5K: a 9-week running program
• Yoga with Adriene: an inclusive yoga program for every body
• Silver Sneakers: Free for adults 65+ with some Medicare plans
• Nike Training Club: A network of at-home workouts from world-class trainers
• MapMyFitness: Find a place to exercise anywhere
• Nerd Fitness: Nutrition, fitness, and motivation
• My Fitness Pal: Convenient tracking of calories, movement, and goals
• Seven: A library of seven-minute workouts
• Strava: The social network for runners
• Bodi: On-demand fitness classes ranging from yoga to power lifting
• Curves: A women’s fitness club
• Classpass: A gateway to independent fitness and exercise classes
• Peloton: Thousands of exercise classes, many of which don’t require a bike

“Fitness Blender is super ADHD-friendly. It has a huge variety of free workout videos of varying length and style. You can search with lots of different filters to find exactly what you want or purchase multi-week courses. There are ‘fitness dice’ with different no-equipment exercises on each side. You roll the dice to discover your mini-workout for the day.” — Alice, Alaska

[Read: Exercise and the ADHD Brain – The Neuroscience of Movement]

“Ladder is an exercise app that offer short workouts with equipment I have at home. It creates a weekly workout plan that has kept me from getting bored and has a coach talking you through and motivating you during your workout.” — Alison, Colorado

How to Start Working Out: Helpful Supports

What motivates people with ADHD to start exercising, and to stick with it, despite boredom, fatigue and other hurdles? ADDitude readers chimed in by rating the supports they find most helpful (out of 5):

• Personal trainer: 3.66
• Accountability partner(s): 3.33
• Gym or fitness class membership: 3.06
• Race or event registration to apply deadline pressure: 3.02
• Spouse, family member, friend: 2.94
• Exercise app: 2.82
• ADHD coach: 2.79
• In-home exercise equipment: 2.72
• Online exercise class subscription: 2.51

“Exercise trainers were incredibly helpful to make me stick to an exercise routine, not to mention learning about proper exercise form, nutrition etc.” — Liv, Texas

“Taking up competitive sport for the thrill factor, accountability, training routine and social interaction was the most helpful.” — Tony, Australia

How to Start Working Out: Reader-Tested Techniques

Anyone with ADHD knows that the slogan “Just do it” doesn’t motivate neurodivergent people to lace up their Nikes. What does work? Here is the most popular advice from our readers:

Exercise Before Coffee

“By exercising first thing, I get it over with right away, and I can move on with my day without exercise looming over my head. It also helps me to eat healthier and have more energy during the day.” — Rachel, Minnesota

“Daily exercise is probably the thing that helps me most with ADHD management, physical and mental health. The first thing I do in the morning is a 30-minute, very low-intensity routine. The key here is to lower the bar, by keeping it simple and easy, and turning it into a daily habit.” — Joanna, France

Invest

“Giving myself permission to spend money on a personal trainer has been the single best thing I’ve done as an adult. It hits all my triggers: I’ve spent money on it, have a scheduled appointment, someone else has to come up with what we are doing, and I have an accountability partner — all in one.” — LN, Wisconsin

Prioritize Fun

“I do dancing because I love it, yoga for relaxation, white water rafting for the adrenaline and fun, and swimming in natural waters because I feel really joyful to mingle with Mother Nature!” — An ADDitude Reader

“I download books and podcasts to listen to while walking the dog. If I only allow myself to listen to the series or book while exercising, I look forward to the next exercise.” — Ellie, Virginia

Do It at Home

“I got an under-the-desk elliptical that I love, as it alleviates the anxious energy I have while I have to sit at my desk, and I can do something productive with my feet instead of having non-stop leg shaking going on.” — Laura, Arizona

Do It Anywhere But Home

“I have to do exercise outside the home because there are too many excuses (laundry, email, cleaning) at home.” — Valeria, Colorado

Incorporate It Into Your Daily Routine

“I take bathroom breaks at work at least one floor away so I use the stairs multiple times a day.” — An ADDitude reader in Washington

“Park 15 minutes away from work, or get off the bus five stops early. The quiet walking time is a very nice way to gear up for the work day.” — Francine, Canada

“Have a dog that demands walks.” — MC, Canada

Identify a Goal

“Start something that has short-term goals that progress to long-term goals as part of the program, like martial arts. That’s how I ended up earning black belts in two different arts.” — An ADDitude Reader

“When I was running, signing up to participate in 5k and 10k races helped.” — Keena, Wisconsin

“Have a Plan A (big workout or run) and a Plan B (small workout or run) if you have no energy for Plan A. That way, I still feel like I’ve achieved my goal, even if it’s just five minutes of exercise.” — Alex, New Zealand

Recruit an Accountability Partner

“I walk with a friend who has limited availability; knowing that encourages me to join her on the two afternoons a week she is available.” — Dianne, Massachusetts

“I enjoy Apple Watch sharing with friends. We can compete and that keeps me from skipping workouts.” — Cassie, South Carolina

“I started horseback riding in spring, and for the health of the horse I have to exercise. Doing it for the horse is extremely helpful.” — Veronika, Germany

How to Start Working Out: Next Steps

• Read: I Can’t Muster Workout Motivation!
• Read: The Best Workout Apps for Your ADHD Brain & Body
• Read: Sports for ADHD – The Activities That Activate Neurodivergent Brains

SUPPORT ADDITUDE
Thank you for reading ADDitude. To support our mission of providing ADHD education and support, please consider subscribing. Your readership and support help make our content and outreach possible. Thank you.

We make time for everything and everyone but ourselves. We consistently prioritize the needs of others. We feel guilty erecting boundaries. And this struggle to carve out space for our own wellbeing is the biggest barrier to mental and emotional health for more than half of adults with ADHD, according to a new survey of 1,898 ADDitude readers.

“I have a hard time putting myself first. I worry about others to my own detriment.”

“I really want to journal but, when I remember to, I spend an hour writing and then find myself thinking, ‘I don’t have time for this!’”

On a 10-point scale, where 10 is extremely satisfied, ADDitude readers rated their mental and emotional health a 5.2. Additional barriers to mental health care cited by readers include the following:

• Defining effective self-care strategies: 45%
• Sticking with a routine: 45%
• Practicing mindful meditation and/or gratitude: 38%
• Affording a mental-health practitioner: 23%

“Insurance makes things impossible sometimes. Also, I’ve had to switch mental healthcare doctors many times due to clashes of ideals and personality. One actually said ADHD wasn’t real and that I just needed discipline to work through my ‘laziness’.”

“I have not found a single counselor who is highly familiar with adult ADHD and its nasty companions.”

[Get This Free Download: Make Mindfulness Work for You]

Top Mental Health Apps and Tools

Following are the top apps, websites, podcasts, books, and other resources recommended by ADDitude readers for improving mental and emotional health.

Self-Care Apps

• Insight Timer: Guided meditation sessions, music, and courses for mindfulness and relaxation
• Balance: Personalized meditation that adapts sessions to your goals and progress
• Gratitude: Foster daily gratitude and positivity via journaling
• Happify: Activities and games to boost happiness and reduce stress
• Headspace: Mindfulness and meditation tools, sleep sounds, mindful movement, and exercise.
• Calm: Sleep stories and music, meditation and inspirational stories, mood tracking, and relaxation tools
• Healthy Minds: Unlock wellbeing my practicing four skills — awareness, connection, insight, and purpose
• Finch: Nurture a virtual pet by completing daily wellness and self-care tasks

Self-Care YouTube Channels, Podcasts, and Websites

• How to ADHD: A YouTube channel created by Jessica McCabe that offers practical tools and insights for living with ADHD.
• The Happiness Lab: A podcast by Laurie Santos, Ph.D., that explores science-backed strategies for a happier life.
• The Teen Anxiety Maze : A podcast by Cynthia Coufal, a teen anxiety coach.
• Therapy in a Nutshell : A mental health and strategies podcast, YouTube channel, and website by Emma McAdam, LMFT.
• Something Shiny: A podcast by therapists David Kessler and Isabelle Richards that tackles ADHD and relationships with humor and authenticity.
• ADDitude ADHD Experts: Leading experts in ADHD and mental health share the latest research and proven strategies.

Self-Care Books

• ADHD 2.0 (#CommissionsEarned)by Edward M. Hallowell, M.D., and John Ratey, M.D.
• Your Brain Is Not Broken (#CommissionsEarned) by Tamara Rosier, Ph.D.
• The Gift of Imperfection (#CommissionsEarned) by Brené Brown
• Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life (#CommissionsEarned) by Steven C. Hayes and Spencer Smith

Daily Self-Care Approaches

To prioritize self-care, many ADDitude readers incorporate small practices and routines into daily life. Here is their advice.

“Take three deep breaths a few times a day. Connect it to something you are doing anyway; do it after going to the bathroom first thing in the morning or when you get into your car.”

“I have a ‘blow off steam’ playlist that I listen to when I feel wired or hostile. (I also have calming playlists!)”

“As weird as it sounds, I find ChatGPT great for journaling. It asks me questions about what I’ve written and helps me develop a deeper understanding of my thoughts.”

“Exercise is the magic medicine for my mental health. I notice a difference in my energy, focus, attitude, and motivation to get things done when I exercise. I try to walk three days a week and attend a class at my local YMCA three days a week.”

“I write about three good things every morning. It gives me a sense of achievement and agency and calms my anxiety.”

“I have set aside Fridays after work as ‘nothing needs to get done’ time.”

“I try to have 30 minutes of ‘me’ time every day. I take a bath, listen to an audiobook, or watch a show.”

[Read: 31 Ways to Work Out the Kinks in Your Workout Plan]

The Power of Therapy and Medication for Mental Health

Readers report that taking prescribed medications and working with mental health professionals do wonders for their health, and assigned the following “helpfulness” ratings to each tool (on a 5-point scale where 5 is extremely helpful):

• Therapist (in-person or online): 4.11
• Medication for ADHD: 3.91
• Medication for another condition: 3.88
• Psychiatrist: 3.67

“ADHD meds have helped so much with emotional regulation that I’m quite upset I didn’t have access to them earlier!”

“Medication for anxiety has largely cleared up my ADHD mess, so much that I’m able to handle other sides that come up (time blindness, forgetfulness, etc.)”

“Accessing a therapist is paramount to understanding your emotions, triggers, and boundaries.”

“Medication can be so helpful, but it can take a while to figure out what works for you. Try some stuff and don’t be afraid to try something else if it is not working or if side effects make life unfun. Also, know that medication is a helpful tool, but it doesn’t do the work for you. It helps you do the work of setting up systems, finding coping skills and accommodations, and looking honestly at how your current patterns are helping or hurting you as you seek to be the best you.”

More Recommended Mental Health Supports

What other supports are helpful for improving mental and emotional health? ADDitude readers contributed the following “helpfulness” ratings:

• ADHD coach: 3.67
• Yoga or meditation class: 3.50
• Spouse, family member, friend: 3.38
• Anger-management training: 2.75
• Journaling: 3.08

“Get a good yoga teacher who focuses on the emotional benefits of yoga as well as the physical benefits. It is so much more than exercise and is really beneficial for all sorts of ADHD symptoms, too.”

“Find safe spaces to talk about your feelings, even if it is just an online community of strangers. Communities of people with ADHD are great to engage with because they have empathy for what you are experiencing and often really great advice for ways to better your daily life.”

“There is something therapeutic about writing on paper while curled up in a chair. It clears my mind and gets the chaos out of my head.”

“My most helpful experiences come from seeing others with similar struggles and finding that I am normal.”

How to Improve Mental Health: Next Steps

• Celebrate Every Step: Join the Small Wins Appreciation Network!
• Read: 11 Self Care Strategies for ADHD Brains
• Read: “Your ADHD Self-Improvement Plan — 6 Steps to a Better You”
• Join Us! ADHD Support Group for Adults

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Q: Do people with ADHD experience winter depression more often and more severely than do neurotypical individuals? Also, why is my quality of sleep affected in winter?

Winter depression is marked by two or more weeks of low mood, usually starting in the Northern Hemisphere’s fall or winter when there is less daylight, that resolves in the spring or summer when there is more light. There is an association between winter depression, also known as seasonal affective disorder, or SAD, and ADHD.

In the Netherlands, where I live, researchers asked 259 patients with ADHD about seasonal mood swings; 27% reported winter depression compared with 3% in neurotypical people.¹ Other researchers have confirmed this increased rate among people with ADHD.² What’s more, females are four times more likely than males to have winter depression.¹

Sleep problems are also common among people with ADHD: About 80% are late sleepers³ , which means they have a short sleep duration — they fall asleep at a later time and sleep less because they must wake up for work or school.

Q : How does winter depression relate to screen addiction in children with ADHD?

Children with ADHD who are late sleepers and who experience winter depression may turn to video games and the Internet. Screens emit blue light, and they’re often held close to the eye, so the effects are similar to light therapy if you’re staring at them for a while.

[Get This Free Download: How to Sleep Better with ADHD]

Screen use at night can induce delayed circadian rhythms, disrupting your sleep-wake cycle.⁴ Many children with ADHD are already late sleepers, so using screens after 9:30 pm will delay their rhythm even more; this is not recommended. Keep in mind that when sleep gets delayed, mood is affected.

The good news is that winter depression and sleep problems can be easily and quickly treated with artificial light therapy. A 10,000-lux light therapy lamp can be used for 30 minutes a day for 5 to 20 consecutive days. The lamp, or light box, should be used at a close distance to your eyes; the distance is very important for the intensity of the treatment. It’s best to do this every day at the same time, preferably between 7 and 8 am, to reset your biological clock and alter the sleep-wake cycle.

You may also consider using light therapy glasses, which work in the same way as lamps. You can wear these for 30 minutes a day while you’re dressing or eating breakfast; in other words, without disrupting your routine.

Light therapy is a serious antidepressant that often unlocks better mood, improved sleep, and more energy.

[Read: How to Fall Asleep with a Rowdy, Racing ADHD Brain]

Q:  Is vitamin D recommended for people with winter depression?

If your vitamin D is too low, then taking vitamin D is recommended. Vitamin D is generally low in people with ADHD, though we don’t know why.⁵ You get vitamin D from sunlight; in winter, when there is less light, you may need to take a supplement. Another way we can get vitamin D is by eating fatty fish, though many people don’t eat enough to affect levels.

Winter Depression: Next Steps

• Self-Test: Could You Have Delayed Sleep Phase Disorder?
• Read: 9 Sleep Deprivation Solutions for Adults with ADHD
• Read: 6 Tips to Overcoming Winter Depression
  

J.J. Sandra Kooij, M.D., Ph.D., is a psychiatrist and head of the Expertise Center Adult ADHD at PsyQ in the Netherlands.

SUPPORT ADDITUDE
Thank you for reading ADDitude. To support our mission of providing ADHD education and support, please consider subscribing. Your readership and support help make our content and outreach possible. Thank you.

Sources

¹Amons, P. J., Kooij, J. J., Haffmans, P. M., Hoffman, T. O., & Hoencamp, E. (2006). Seasonality of mood disorders in adults with lifetime attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). Journal of affective disorders, 91(2-3), 251–255. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jad.2005.11.017

²Wynchank, D. S., Bijlenga, D., Lamers, F., Bron, T. I., Winthorst, W. H., Vogel, S. W., Penninx, B. W., Beekman, A. T., & Kooij, J. S. (2016). ADHD, circadian rhythms and seasonality. Journal of psychiatric research, 81, 87–94. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jpsychires.2016.06.018

³Van Veen, M. M., Kooij, J. J., Boonstra, A. M., Gordijn, M. C., & Van Someren, E. J. (2010). Delayed circadian rhythm in adults with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder and chronic sleep-onset insomnia. Biological psychiatry, 67(11), 1091–1096. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.biopsych.2009.12.032

⁴Hartstein, L. E., Mathew, G. M., Reichenberger, D. A., Rodriguez, I., Allen, N., Chang, A. M., Chaput, J. P., Christakis, D. A., Garrison, M., Gooley, J. J., Koos, J. A., Van Den Bulck, J., Woods, H., Zeitzer, J. M., Dzierzewski, J. M., & Hale, L. (2024). The impact of screen use on sleep health across the lifespan: A National Sleep Foundation consensus statement. Sleep health, 10(4), 373–384. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.sleh.2024.05.001

⁵Khoshbakht, Y., Bidaki, R., & Salehi-abargouei, A. (2018). Vitamin D Status and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder: A Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis of Observational Studies.. Advances in nutrition, 9 1, 9-20 . https://doi.org/10.1093/advances/nmx002.

Brain volume, and the genetic variants that influence it, is tied to ADHD and Parkinson’s disease risks, suggests one of the most extensive international studies to date on DNA and brain structure.¹

The new study, published in Nature Genetics, examined how brain size and genetic differences influence key subcortical or ‘deep brain’ regions crucial for memory, emotional regulation, proprioception, sensory processing, and responses to rewards and punishments.

A team of 189 researchers from 45 countries analyzed data from genome-wide association studies (GWAS) and magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) brain scans of 74,898 participants across 19 countries. They identified 254 genetic variants that impact brain volume and the likelihood of developing ADHD and Parkinson’s disease.

“Genetic variants associated with larger brain volumes in key brain regions also increase the risk of Parkinson’s disease, while variants linked to smaller brain volumes in key regions are associated with an increased risk of ADHD,” said Miguel Rentería, Ph.D., study principal and associate professor at the Queensland Institute of Medical Research (QIMR Berghofer) in Australia, in a statement. “These findings suggest that genetic influences that underpin individual differences in brain structure may be fundamental to understanding the underlying causes of brain-related disorders.”

However, more studies are needed on the causal relationship between genes and brain-based diseases. “It’s worth noting that these are correlations, not causal relationships, and so interpretation must be approached with caution,” Rentería said.

“My theory is that the underlying mechanisms involve genes crucial to brain development, growth, and aging processes,” Rentería told Medical News Today. “We plan to further investigate to identify the exact biological pathways involved. Understanding these mechanisms could illuminate how brain structure impacts susceptibility to both neurodegenerative and psychiatric conditions, potentially guiding future therapeutic strategies.”

The researchers used data from the Enhancing Neuro Imaging Genetics through Meta-Analysis (ENIGMA) consortium, an international effort led by Keck School of Medicine of USC; the Cohorts for Heart and Aging Research in Genomic Epidemiology (CHARGE) at Baylor College of Medicine; the UK Biobank; and the Adolescent Brain Cognitive Development (ABCD) study.

ADHD and Parkinson’s Disease

According to the World Health Organization and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, rates of Parkinson’s disease and ADHD continue to rise.

In 2018, researchers from the University of Utah Health found that the risk of early-onset Parkinson’s disease and similar disorders is 2.4 times greater among patients with ADHD than it is among individuals of the same gender and age without ADHD. The study, published in Neuropsychopharmacology, examined medical records from the Utah Population Database (UPDB) of 31,769 patients with ADHD and 158,790 individuals without the condition.²

Sources

¹ García-Marín, L. M., Campos, A. I., Diaz-Torres, S., Rabinowitz, J. A., Ceja, Z., Mitchell, B. L., Grasby, K. L., Thorp, J. G., Agartz, I., Alhusaini, S., Ames, D., Amouyel, P., Andreassen, O. A., Arfanakis, K., Arias-Vasquez, A., Armstrong, N. J., Athanasiu, L., Bastin, M. E., Beiser, A. S., … Rentería, M. E. (2024). Genomic Analysis of Intracranial and Subcortical Brain Volumes Yields Polygenic Scores Accounting for Variation Across Ancestries. Nature Genetics. https://doi.org/10.1038/s41588-024-01951-z

² Curtin, K., Fleckenstein, A.E., Keeshin, B.R., et al. (2018). Increased Risk of Diseases of the Basal Ganglia and Cerebellum in Patients with a History of Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder. Neuropsychopharmacology. https://doi.org/10.1038/s41386-018-0207-5

Sleep problems are highly prevalent among adults with ADHD. Individuals who have ADHD and one or more psychiatric comorbidities face an increased risk for disordered sleep, according to a study published in the Journal of Attention Disorders.¹

The study followed a large sample of adults with ADHD in the Netherlands after they were referred to an outpatient mental health clinic. Nearly two-thirds of these patients screened positive for a sleep problem. Most screened positive for delayed sleep phase syndrome (35.8%), followed by insomnia (30.6%) and restless leg syndrome (28.8%).

Women with ADHD were more likely to report more types of sleep problems compared to men with ADHD. Women more often reported insomnia, hypersomnia, and parasomnia, while men more often reported sleep-related breathing disorders (SBD).

Adults with ADHD and mental health conditions faced a higher likelihood of having any type of sleep problem and of having more than one sleep problem than did those with ADHD alone. The risk of sleep problems was highest in adults with PTSD (OR=3.21), followed by:

• Substance use disorder (OR=1.76)
• Depression (OR=1.73)
• Anxiety (OR=1.51)
• Personality disorders (OR=1.54)

Why Do Adults with ADHD Struggle with Sleep?

Sleep disorders impact around 50 million Americans or 15% of the U.S. population.² This percentage is significantly higher in ADHD populations, as shown in the current study. According to data cited by the authors, disordered sleep affects an estimated 40% to 80% of adults with ADHD.^{3, 4} The most common sleep disorders are similar for both groups and include insomnia, restless legs syndrome (RLS), narcolepsy, and sleep apnea.^{5, 6}

ADHD and sleep go hand in hand, and the impact of one disorder can worsen the symptoms of the other. For example, the American Academy of Neurology found that people with ADHD and RLS experience more severe RLS symptoms than do those without ADHD.⁷

Many sleep problems are biological, but they can also be behaviorally motivated. A study cited by the authors shows that cognitive behavioral symptoms such as bedtime procrastination can delay sleep onset and potentially disrupt melatonin production.⁸

“Symptoms of ADHD exacerbate the things that make sleep hard for all of us,” said Joel Nigg, Ph.D., in his 2018 webinar with ADDitude, “Sleep and the ADHD Brain: Why It’s Critical and How to Get More.”

“Your body reacts more strongly to stimulation,” Nigg said. “You’re more hyper-aroused by things that happen during the day. It’s harder to turn your brain off. It’s a natural side effect of what ADHD is. Sleep requires the opposite of the energy that ADHD provokes, [making sleep] naturally difficult. That’s why it takes the kind of deliberate attention, behavioral strategy, or kind of tackling of this so often for those with ADHD.”

What Are the Consequences of Untreated Sleep Problems?

The impact of misdiagnosing symptoms of disordered sleep can have long-term consequences, leading to “poor treatment, and persistence and aggravation of symptoms,” the authors wrote.

Symptoms of poor sleep can look like ADHD and vice versa, making them somewhat difficult to differentiate. Left untreated, disordered sleep can worsen with age and cause a ripple effect from caregivers to their children.⁹

“Sung did a study [in 2008], which found that moderate or severe sleep problems in children with ADHD were strongly associated with the mental health of their primary caregivers and with those caregivers’ work attendance and overall family functioning,” said Roberto Olivardia, Ph.D., during his 2019 webinar with ADDitude, “Time for Bed! Sleep Solutions for the ADHD Brain.”

The good news is that “treatments for specific sleep problems are available, relatively accessible to implement in ADHD patients, and can improve ADHD treatment results substantially,” the authors wrote. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and lifestyle changes are first-line treatments for many sleep disorders and can be more effective than sleep medicine.¹⁰

Limitations, Strengths, and Future Research

The study followed 3,691 adults diagnosed with ADHD from 2018 to 2020. Data was assessed via electronic patient files and included an even male-to-female ratio. Adults with ADHD were referred to one of 46 specialized outpatient clinics in the Netherlands by their general practitioner or mental health counselor. The Holland Sleep Disorder Questionnaire (HSDQ) was used to assess sleep disorders, though it was used as a screening tool and not to diagnose. The DIVA-5 was used to test for ADHD, and the M.I.N.I was used to screen for psychiatric comorbidities.

Limitations of the study include a lack of control group. And although some patients had been diagnosed with a sleep disorder before being referred to an outpatient clinic, the HSDQ was only able to screen for sleep problems. Some data, such as BMI and treatment status, was not accounted for as it was not systematically recorded in patient files. Given each patient received a clinical referral, the severity of symptoms experienced by patients should be considered when interpreting results.

Future studies would benefit by measuring causal factors contributing to sleep problems in adults with ADHD. These studies should also include subjective sleep parameters, such as actigraphy and polysomnography, which were not included here. Insomnia has been widely studied in sleep research; more research is needed on other sleep disorders, including periodic limb movement disorder (PLMD), RLS, DSPS, and SBD.

Sources

¹ van der Ham, M., Bijlenga, D., Böhmer, M., Beekman, A.T.F., & Kooij, S. (2024). Sleep problems in adults With ADHD: prevalences and their relationship with psychiatric comorbidity. Journal of Attention Disorders, 28(13), 1642-1652. https://doi.org/10.1177/10870547241284477

² American Psychiatric Association. (2024). What are Sleep Disorders? https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/sleep-disorders/what-are-sleep-disorders

³Wynchank, D., Bijlenga, D., Beekman, A.T. et al. (2017). Adult attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) and insomnia: an update of the literature. Curr Psychiatry Rep 19, 98. https://doi.org/10.1007/s11920-017-0860-0

⁴Batten, L. (2022, August 17). How ADHD Impacts Your Sleep And What You Can Do About It. Frida. https://www.talkwithfrida.com/learn/how-adhd-impacts-your-sleep/

⁵ U.S. Centers for Disease Control & Prevention. (2024, May 15). About Sleep. https://www.cdc.gov/sleep/about/index.html

⁶ Cleveland Clinic. (2023, June 19). Sleep Disorders. https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/11429-sleep-disorders

⁷ American Academy Of Neurology. (2001, May 8). Adults With Restless Legs Syndrome More Likely To Have ADHD. ScienceDaily. www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2001/05/010508082849.htm

⁸ Li, X., Buxton, O. M., Kim, Y., Haneuse, S., & Kawachi, I. (2020). Do procrastinators get worse sleep? Cross-sectional study of U.S. adolescents and young adults. SSM – Population Health, 10, 100518. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.ssmph.2019.100518

⁹ Sung, V., Hiscock, H., Sciberras, E., Efron, D. (2008). Sleep problems in children with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder: prevalence and the effect on the child and family. Arch Pediatr Adolesc Med, 162(4):336–342. https://doi.org/10.1001/archpedi.162.4.336

¹⁰ Mitchell, M.D., Gehrman, P., Perlis, M. et al. (2012). Comparative effectiveness of cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia: a systematic review. BMC Fam Pract, 13, 40. https://doi.org/10.1186/1471-2296-13-40

These are the qualities of an untrustworthy person – qualities I lived and breathed while (trying) to manage my undiagnosed ADHD.

ADHD – especially untreated – is a condition of inconsistency. We’re inexplicably “on” one day and “off” the next. It causes us to struggle to understand our behaviors and work out why we did (or didn’t) do something.

I’d say one thing but do another; make a plan, then forget it. I’d blurt out random things and make the simplest mistakes. I was scared to make future commitments because I couldn’t be sure what I’d be like when the day arrived – brilliant, or so off that it was hard to leave the house.

I was inconsistent in mood, attention, behavior, focus, and even goals. I had no inkling that there was any pattern to it. I wanted to do interesting things but committing to something out of the ordinary – like writing this blog post – risked months of dread, guilt, and procrastination.

A lifetime of inconsistency led to some strange consequences. Making even a small error would trigger an intense emotional reaction. Around other people, I tried to stay quiet, to hold in the ‘weirdness.’ And I’d check my work again, again, and again.

[Read: Intention Deficit Disorder – Why ADHD Minds Struggle to Meet Goals with Action]

Why Don’t I Trust Myself? The Roots of Inconsistency

Before I knew anything about ADHD, I thought I had a clear picture of the root of my problems: anxiety and low self-confidence. I worked my way through the go-to tools: cognitive behavioral therapy, books about social skills, special breathing techniques, you name it. I even read Self-Esteem for Dummies.

Over the years, it all helped. But while I could stand up straighter, smile at myself in the mirror, and name three of my greatest qualities, I still was caught in spirals of procrastination, zoning out, obsession, and impulsiveness.

My old friend anxiety kept my brain awake enough to let me drive a car, find my keys, and pay my bills. Low self-confidence kept me out of sticky situations but led to a smaller life over time.

Then I heard about inattentive ADHD and what it looks like in women. Many, many hours of research later, I was finally able to make sense of my experiences and actions. As I learned about executive dysfunction and common support strategies, I was able to recognize those I was already using – and where I was tripping myself up.

[Read: Your Regret Won’t Change the Past. These Tips May Save Your Future.]

But I was also assured that my brain would inevitably function fabulously in certain situations. The wealth of insight around the web from people who live with ADHD nudged me toward greater self-awareness. (After I read on the web that an unofficial trait of ADHD is argumentativeness, I asked a friend if that applied to me. He laughed in my face – I think that’s a yes.)

I learned how to plan my day in a way that my brain can “see.” I do things at a pace and plan that works for me. For example, rather than write this blog post in one sitting, I’ve taken to writing it in multiple locations, while wearing ear plugs, for 15 minutes at a time, while checking in on my emotional state. No matter the task, I regularly ask myself, “How does my ADHD play into this?” and “What will make this task easier for Future Me?”

Learning to Trust Myself – Even with ADHD

I’ve experienced some unexpected changes now that I trust myself more. For one thing, I now believe that it’s okay to make mistakes. I can calm down after the inevitable Big Feelings, and I know how to motivate myself to make amends. I even have an “oops quota” – if I go over my limit, I know it’s a sign that I need to tweak my systems. My ADHD-friendly systems take care of me, and I take care of them.

I can also now resist the urge to apologize for being the way I am. True, if you say, “How are you?” I may tell you in exquisite detail, or I may stare at you and not be able to think of a response. So what? I’m learning the words to explain why I do what I do, without framing it as a deficit. I want to get good at standing up for my right to be myself.

Perfection isn’t a prerequisite for self-trust (or to gain the trust of others). It’s consistency in another form: knowing that I do my best, learn from my mistakes, practice honesty, and pull through most of the time. Understanding my version of ADHD has transformed my ability to trust myself.

Learning about ADHD not only solved the mysteries of my inconsistency, but it helped ease my anxiety and increase my confidence. It released me from the fear that I was simply a bad person. It freed me up to create new, better stories about myself. Now, I can be pretty sure that if I say I’ll do something, I’ll probably do it… like writing this blog post!

Why Don’t I Trust Myself? Next Steps

• Free Download: A Guide to Becoming Your Best You!
• Read: Why ADHD Self-Awareness is the Key to Effective Action
• Read: 5 Little Changes That Freed My ADHD Mind

SUPPORT ADDITUDE
Thank you for reading ADDitude. To support our mission of providing ADHD education and support, please consider subscribing. Your readership and support help make our content and outreach possible. Thank you.